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Post by Deleted on Jun 9, 2013 12:05:30 GMT 2
Nessa was almost hesitant to break the kiss desperate to draw every last moment of contact with the gorgeous generous maddening man beneath her. So sure that this may be the last time she was held in his arms. Those strong powerful arms that lifed her so effortlessly could throw her round N and yet his roughened hands could be so gentle. Even if he took it for granted things could go back to the way things had been nessa knew better. Knew that when she left here she was another step closer to being Mrs Stephen Carter. The gaudy ring still sat at the bottom of her bag. There was one thing she could do for Leon she'd let him keep the photo because she had vivid colour memories something he never got a chance to have even if they were bitter sweet.
Eventually after lying there in silence for a couple of minutes drawing comfort from the familiar embrace, it was the icy eyed woman who moved first. Gracefully extricating herself from his embrace. Wordlessly she began the journey back to the car leaving him on his back for a moment. She let out a shuddering sigh her shoulders shook slightly before her normal perfect posture and sashay returned her hips swaying with each step. She feels more than sees when he catches up with her it had taken her those few moments to bring herself under control but just his presence was threatening to derail her. He drove her crazy and part of her just wanted to know that even after she had failed him and their daughter he still wanted her. That she wasn't tainted that subconsciously he didn't think there was something else she could have done. She blamed herself enough without seeing that judgement reflected in lees dark depths. Holding her hand out palm upward.
Nessa: keys lee.
She knew she was taking a chance no one drove the skyline but lee.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 9, 2013 13:53:03 GMT 2
Leon had never thought he would have children. Even when he had been with Nessa and he had been planning to spend his life with her. Children had never crossed his mind. Why would they? He wasn’t the most stable person, he had a criminal record for attempted murder, and he was a street racer who ran with a pretty bad crowd. That was not the life you wanted to bring a child into. No child deserved to be brought into the world when both parents couldn’t be there. There was very chance that something was going to happen to him, that he would be taken away or his family would have been used to get to him. He couldn’t risk that and wouldn’t risk that. Finding out though that you had a child, a child that was cruelly taken away from you and even worse taken away from you as a warning, there was no other feeling. It was like a crushing weight on his chest, he found it difficult to breath and even with the comforting weight on his chest her head resting over his heart and his arms wrapped around her tightly, didn’t stop the feeling that was constricting his chest.
Nessa pulled away from him too quickly, not only physically but emotionally. He could feel her pulling away from him and he couldn’t stand that. She was putting all those walls back up that he had spent years breaking down. Finally pushing himself up from the sand he brushed his jeans down and jogged to catch up with her, his hand snaking around her waist. Raising a brow at her as she asked for his keys he hesitated slightly. Only one other person got to drive his car and that was his sister. Reaching into his back pocket he dropped the keys into the palm of her hand and when the doors were unlocked he moved over to the passenger seat. He didn’t need to tell her to be careful he knew she knew not to take any risks with his baby. Looking over at Nessa he sighed deeply “She Was beautiful Nessa”
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Post by Deleted on Jun 9, 2013 16:09:06 GMT 2
It made sense for her to drive she knew where she was going, knew where their little girl lay. Vanessa may have done her best to make it beautiful but that didn't take away from what it was. It was a grave, cold earth lay onto of her precious darling. Running her hand over the steering wheel she takes a deep breath she was about to drive his 'baby' she hears what he says about Hope being beautiful and nods her head in agreement. Not trusting herself to speak simply wondering how he can trust her with his baby when she's already destroyed one of his baby's.
Nessa: you sure you can trust me with your baby Leon, I mean i don't have the best track record with taking care of them.
She started the engine before he could change his mind, the lack of traffic encouraging her to go as fast as she dared. heading away from the beach a place she had once thought of as theirs, she could never look at a beach without thinking of Lee, she couldn't see a magnolia without thinking of Hope. Her eyes on the road she never looks to Leon even though she could get to this place with her eyes closed from anywhere. She came alone at least once a week, it was peaceful and she came to think as well as be close to what might have been. Her emotions once more hidden this was for him his chance to mourn, mourn their daughter mourn Nessa's mistake.
Nessa: Lee, if i could change places with her I would. I'd rather her in your arms.
It was about twenty minutes moving further inland, before Leon's lithe former lover killed the engine, it was a beautiful place but it was still a cemetery, as she exited the car she waited for the strong frame of her baby's father taking his hand she led him away from the majority of the stones to an area that appeared to be completely empty until you rounded a tree. A gorgeous white marble teddy bear, a magnolia tree in bloom stood behind it and a small bench was next to the stone.
Ms Lopez's hand slides out of his as she takes the few steps needed to reach their little girl. delicate hand running over the top of the teddy bear. Eyes taking in the engravings on the belly of the teddy bear: Hope Faye Perez, too good for this world left behind a devastated mommy and a heart broken daddy. On the plinth the teddy rested on was the gold engraving resting in the arms of angels with the image of an angel cradling a child. Kneeling down she whispers to the stone.
Nessa: Mommy brought daddy to see you.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 15, 2013 16:54:24 GMT 2
Dark hues snapped over towards the woman at his side, his brow furrowing and quirking together , shaking his head he let out a deep sigh as he looked to her. He didn’t know what to say to her to make her understand that he didn’t blame her for what he happened to their daughter. She hadn’t expected it to happen, and if it was anyone’s fault it was his own. He had been the one who had ignored her fathers wishes, had told his goons to fuck themselves, sent them back with a bloody nose and his foot up their ass. It had been him who the warning had been sent for. It was his fault not hers. Taking her hand, he offered it a small squeeze, there were no words for him to explain to her that it wasn’t her fault, because even if he could find the words there was no way she would ever believe them. She was damn stubborn like that. “I trust you more than anyone Nessa”
It didn’t take them long to arrive at the graveyard, but then with Nessa driving things never did, his gaze snapped over to hers once more through the drive, her words hitting him in the damn chest. Shaking his head he sighed, “I know” He stated his voice hoarse. Words would never been able to explain anything to her. He kept his gaze on her in worry as they continued the drive. Arriving not much longer. Stepping out of the car he allowed her to lead them through the cemetery, watching her carefully. He could see the change in her, the squaring of her shoulders, the stiffening of her back. She was putting up her walls so he couldn’t read her. He hated when she did that. Her hands though were sure in his as she continued leading them further along the graves to an almost empty spot. Then she pulled away and he knew they had arrived, with furrowed brow he stayed back for a moment, watching her with dark hues, leaving her to have a moment with her child….their child. Licking his lips he shoved his hands in his pockets before stepping a little closer towards her.
Swallowing thickly when she mentioned that she had brought daddy closing his eyes for a moment to composure himself he stepped over towards her, moving his hand to slide up her arm, slowly pulling her away from the grave tone, turning her around os he could pull her against his form, the second she was against him, he wrapped large arms around her and held her tightly against him. His chin rested against the top of her head, his gaze though remained locked on the gravestone of his daughter. The daughter he never got to see never got to hold. Swallowing thickly he closed his eyes a tear rolling down his cheek, he would not let what little family he had left, fall apart.
OOC: Sorry for the wait hun.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 15, 2013 22:39:31 GMT 2
She allowed herself to rest against his chest. Her mind wandering to the brief time she got to hold their daughter. Wondering what it be like to be like to be a complete family to be in his arms with hope in hers. Should haves would haves and could haves rolled around in her mind the image of Lee with their beautiful girl in his arms then later on with her on his shoulders even later still chasing off her dates. Should have would have and could have never brought anyone anything but heart ache. She should pull away shouldn't allow this to go on it would only make it harder to leave. The problem was that it felt so right to be in his arms wrapped in that strong embrace.
She felt the tear that slipped down his cheek when it splashed on the back of her neck. Turning in his arms a soft hand reaches to brush away the tear. She stroked along his cheek stubble under her fingers scratching the soft skin. so different from clean shaven manicured and moisturised Stephen he spent more time in the bathroom than she did. Lee took fifteen minutes at best well unless she joined him then you could be talking all day. Laying her head on his chest for a moment allowing his hand to thread through her hair. Neither saying a word because truly there were no words for this type of pain so raw. Nessa still recalled the little white and pink coffin she carried in her arms still remembered placing her in that small hole.
Nessa: I'll give you some time alone.
One last lingering touch and she pulled away to give him time to grieve to cry to blame her the world whoever he held responsible
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Post by Deleted on Jun 19, 2013 13:16:50 GMT 2
He couldn’t believe he had been a father. A father who hadn’t even known he was one. He had always promised himself, sworn on everything he believed in, that he would be a better father than his own. He never even got the chance. She was taken away from him, he liked to think that he would have been a good a father to his child. He would never get the chance though, because she had been taken away from him. Shaking his head he stood there, his arms folded over his chest. He just stared down at his little girls grave. His little girl, the child he would never get to hold, never get to smell that new born scent. Scrubbing his hand over his face he straightened his back and moved back over towards Nessa, his hand snaking out, wrapping around her waist, pulling her towards him, burying his head into the crook of her neck. His hand smoothing through long locks of hair like he had once done before.
“He’s going to pay” His voice gruff, filled with so much emotion that he was trying to hold back. “For everything he’s done, he’s going to pain I promise you” Pulling from her he just looked at her for the longest moment, his dark hues locked on her light ones, his hand lifting to smooth over her cheek, his thumb brushing over her cheek bone. “Come home with me” His dark hues wandering over her features “Cone home with me Nessa” Sighing he tugged her towards him for a moment “I know Faye would loved to see you…give you the big news”
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2013 18:54:28 GMT 2
She heard him speak heard those gruff sensual tones that sent shivers down her spine, she felt her body heat at just the slight tracing of her cheek bone. Wanted so badly to lean into his touch even as she looked to the phone in her hand. The message on screen was quite typical of Stephen, demanding to know where she was when she wasn't in by 11 but not actually caring for the answer. A frustrated sigh left her lips an apologetic glance to Leon she tapped out a response that essentially said she was staying in a friends and that she didn't have a curfew.
Tossing her long dark hair over her shoulder about to pull away from Leon, trying to find her centre because just being close to him had her off balance but being close to him here had her thinking about should have would have and could have all of which brought her heartache. They should have had their little girl, they should have been a family everything could have been perfect it would have been right. They fit together but everything was always so complicated when they were together. The desire hadn't lessened though, she wanted him so desperately even though it would probably put them both in danger.
Nessa: I'll come to see Faye.
It was said in a way that was meant to make it apparent that nothing could happen between them, that earlier had been a mistake born of pain and need, a need to forget. It was a lie she still needed the man still adored him no one understood her like him no one made her feel the way he did but she'd made a promise to marry another man.
(sorry it's so late hospital only just let me out)
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Post by Deleted on Jun 30, 2013 13:56:13 GMT 2
So this was how things were going to be from now on. He knew things were going to be different for them. Therehadnt been a moment in his life that he hadnt thought they wouldnt be. THat if they ever got to see one another again, that she would give him the cold shoulder. He hoped she wouldnt, but deep down he knew she would. Nessa was like that, especially if she thought she was protecting him from something. Not that he needed protecting, he was the one who was supposed to protect her. It was his job to protect people. She may have been the big hot shot agent, but it was down to him to protect her. It was in his nature to keep people safe. As it was turning out he wasnt doing a very good job and could now add his poor, defenseless little baby girl to the list of people he hadnt protected. Hadnt saved.
His dark eyes turned even darker when she told him she was coming to see Faye. He knew what that meant. She was shooting him down, telling him here and now that everything they had previously, the moment they had shared at the beach, and everything else they were sharing, even now, being this close to each other, was over.She was going back to his place to see Faye, that was it. He didnt want it, he didnt want things to be so strained between them, but ther was o doubt in his mind that things were going to continue being strained between them. Shaking his head he let it out a deep breath, folding his arms over his large chest, his gaze locked on her features, roaming hishues over her face. Stepping closer, his hand reached forward, cupping her cheek.
"It doesnt have to be like Nessa" His voice deep. None the less he dropped his hand and shook his head, stepping away from her, and from his little girl and back over towards his car once more. "You driving?" He questioned with a raise of his brow.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 30, 2013 15:14:45 GMT 2
She couldn't help but lick her lips as he stepped toward her cupping her cheek leant into his touch and felt her body tremble as he pulled away her eyes darkened with desire and need before she shook herself. Remembering where she was and why those thoughts should not be entering her head.
Nessa: all I do is hurt people and fail them Le. You'll thank me for it when you have a wonderful wife and kids. shaking her head at his question she tossed the keys to him Long dark locks tossing ffrom side to side as she shook her head she knelt next to the marker her back to the man she would always regard as her soul mate she takes a deep breath fighting back a new wave of tears her eyes glistening like cut ice. Tracing her hand across the top of the stone gently laying a kiss on the cold stone leaving a lipstick kiss on the smooth surface.
Nessa: never forget mommy loves you baby girl. Give mommy the strength to do the right thing.
Walking back toward the car she can't help but link her arm through le's an easy familiarity an instinctive reaction to his presence leaning into him as they headed back to the car
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